glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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