Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
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