I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
