at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
