No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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