she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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