So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
MIDGETS
????
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
