No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Randomize
