So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
