Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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