wakey wakey hands off snakey
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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