Hey man sorry I got all grabby
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
