I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
It's blow job season.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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