I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
