Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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