these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize