I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
this is an emotional support booty call
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
