Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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