And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
