Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize