Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
