Screwed.edu
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
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