we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
