Me too!
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Randomize
