____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
you didnt know i had herpes?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Randomize
