he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
