I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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