instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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