Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
