Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I got chris browned last night
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
