I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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