don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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