I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
