You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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