Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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