it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
