apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
