i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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