you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
