no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Sober January is a disaster.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
