we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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