it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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