last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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