We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
