you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
