I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
