I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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