what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
