they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
