i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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