Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
